Three States of Being

I always say that I have three states in what I say to people going on in my head: What I Want To Say, What I Should Say, and What I Do Say. These are usually relatively entertaining, quite nice, and just too random to be said aloud, lest someone think I'm crazier than I already am.

This is especially apparent when it comes to Professor Fisher. He's a self described "cold hearted bastard" with a penchant for throwing hard candies at us and being generally rather annoying. Lately, the Three States of Telling People Things have been more active - and far less nice - than usual. For example:

Fisher: "Are you sure you want to use that font?"
What I Want to Say: "At least it's not Papyrus."
What I Should Say: "Go Away."
What I Did Say: "Pretty Sure."

Fisher: "Those are like Designer Masturbation: They serve no purpose other than to make you feel good."
What I Want to Say: "I'd like to fly out the door and across campus on a hoverboard while I listen to the soundtrack to the Transformers movie."
What I Should Say: "Go Away."
What I Did Say: "I can make them more functional."

Fisher: "Those text boxes are five pixels too close to the edge of that box. Change it."
What I Want to Say: "If two-and-a-half pixels on either side is that big a deal, than you have way too much time on your hands."
What I Should Say: "Go Away."
What I Did Say: "I'll see what I can do."

Yes, I am a complete wuss.

BTW, I was rather serious about that last post. Yes, I posted it on the first, but it wasn't an April Fool's joke. The more comments, the more I donate to the ASPCA. So comment away!